August 14, 2009 § 2 Comments
When you marry your fiance(e), you’re choosing a family member to join you in a new family. But as I’ve said before, your spouse is the only family member you get to choose; you usually get a lot of extra family along with your spouse that you don’t get to choose! It’s imperative to talk about and agree on how you are going to relate with parents and in-laws once married.
Do you get the feeling the in-laws don’t like you, or don’t approve? Chances are you haven’t spent any time letting them get to know you. How about taking some time this week for both of you to visit them? Even better: invite them to share dinner with you both. Ask them about themselves and talk about topics they would be interested in. Usually you won’t realise that your future in-laws do think highly of you untill you take the time to make conversation with them.
Despite your efforts if you do have issues with parents or in-laws getting in the way of your relationship, it’s important that the two of you are united in your standpoint. Decide together on your boundaries, remember the culture that you have designed together and make sure you protect those values in your marriage.